Syndicated Scifi Show
by claudiapriscus
Summary: Set in "Changing Channels" 5x08 of Supernatural for the comment meme "Kripke Started It" on LJ. Sam and Dean in Stargate SG-1. Jack is not amused.
1. Chapter 1

"Daniel! These two yours?"

"...Mine?" Daniel was not paying attention.

"Archaeologists, Daniel," O'Neill said patiently. He wanted that on the record. Patient. Not in the least testy or...impatient.

Daniel tore his eyes from the two men standing sheepishly in front of them in full Jaffa armor. Well, one of them looked sheepish. The other was poking at his staff weapon interestedly. Daniel pinched the bridge of his nose and tried to wrest his attention back to Jack.

"Uh, no. I think..." he peered at the sheepish one... "Linguist? Specializing in Ancient, under uhm, Thornston. Dr. Winchester, right?" Something clicked, and Daniel gave the young man a strange look. "You're the one with all the medieval demonology texts!"

Dr. Winchester shared a knowing look with his compatriot, who shrugged, or at least attempted to. The armor made a clanking noise, at least

"I guess that's me."

"And you might be...?" O'Neill asked the other man, perhaps a smidge impatiently. But only a smidge. Obviously.

The young man snapped to something approaching attention, and then, as if this was a pop quiz, answered: "Cap...?" he looked to the other man as if for confirmation, who nodded. "-Tain Winchester," he finished confidently. He paused, then added "Uh, sir." He then gave a salute that fell somewhere between half-assed and sarcastic.

Seeing bemusement on the face of the present members of SG-1, the first man piped up with "SG-15" while the second added, "Brothers," and shrugged. Or clanked.

Jack briefly pressed a knuckle into his forehead, managed to rein in the impulse to ask how family members got assigned to the same goddamn SG team.

"So let me get this straight. You two geniuses were out here looking at some rocks or something-"

"The remains of an Ancient facility,"Daniel interjected. Jack glared at him. He trailed off.

"At some rocks or SOMETHING, when the rest of your team was captured in a surprise attack by some minor Goauld. Do I have that right?"

"Pretty much," said the taller brother, shifting uncomfortably in the heavy and above all roasting armor, which Jack took absolutely no joy in at all.

"Minor my ass," muttered the supposed Captain Winchester.

Jack chose to ignore him, choosing to remain calm and dignified and you know, patient.

"So instead of, I don't know, say, calling for back up," -some sarcasm may have leaked in there- "You ambushed and split up a patrol, knocked out two Jaffa warriors, stole their armor, conned your way onto the mothership and then managed to trick Mothra-"

"Mithras, Jack"

"Excuse me, Daniel, Mithras, that's very helpful. Tricked old whatshisface into a secluded area where you then beheaded him? Do I have that about right?"

"Well, we tried exorcising him first." Dr. Winchester admitted.

Daniel looked interested and worried at the same time. "Using which ritual?"

"Does it matter? It didn't work."

"Can we get back to the head-cutting please? Thank you."

"Dude would not shut up," Captain Winchester remarked. "He was all 'you shall pay for this insolence' and 'your weapons cannot harm me' when he wasn't slamming us against the walls."

"Head cutting?" Jack inquired, okay, maybe a little impatiently.

"Shooting him didn't work," said Dr Winchester casually, "He had some sort of force shield or something."

"Didn't work very well against the machete," he added his brother thoughtfully.

"We shot the snake thing, though."

"Dude, that was sick. This place is crazy," Said Captain Winchester to Doctor Winchester.

"Seriously," said Doctor Winchester Captain Winchester.

"And you brought the machete why?" Jack interrupted.

Captain and Dr Winchester shared a meaningful look.

"They come in handy," one supplied.

"I'm getting that." Jack looked over towards the burning wreckage of the mothership. A few pieces of it were still raining down into the atmosphere.

Dr. Winchester followed his gaze. "That was an accident," he apologized, though some might say it was a mite petulant.

"But we rescued the other guys," said Captain Winchester defensively, "And they knew how to work the ring thingies, so here we are."

"Here you are." Jack blinked a few times, as if waiting for the world to rearrange itself into something that made sense.

"So, uh." ventured Captain Winchester, "I don't suppose there'll be pie in commissary?"

Jack waved them away, vaguely motioning towards the gate, where Sam and Teal'c were helping the rest of SG-15 transport their gear back to Earth.

"Jack...."

"Don't say it, Daniel. I don't even want to hear it."

They stood in silence for a moment, watching the remaing debris streak through the atmosphere.

* * *

Sam and Dean clanked their way towards the watery portal.

When they were out of earshot, Dean asked, "Think we're about to be quantum leaped out of here?"

Sam shrugged, "probably. Since we played our roles and everything."

"Too bad," said Dean a little wistfully. "This one was kind of fun."

"The bad guy wasn't so tough." Sam added.

"Did you see the harem costume thing Elena-" he coughed "- Dr. Colma was made to wear?"

Sam rolled his eyes.

"And the spaceship exploded."

"And the spaceship exploded," Dean agreed.


	2. Chapter 2

Putting a little note in here to tell anyone still interested that I've finished the 34,000 word monstrosity that was the expanded version of this comment fic. First chapter is up.

**Summary: ** Sam and Dean have been lurching from show to show for days. They've been injured, humiliated, screwed with, and forced to live _really_ bad writing. When they're finally plunked down in something a little calmer, if a little odd, they dare to hope they're being allowed a breather episode. After all, it seems to be a show about an expedition poking around some completely non-ominous ruins- like a fantasy version of a history channel special, the boys are sure it's bound to be nice and boring.  
**  
Word Count:** 34,000  
**Spoilers: **"Changing Channels" (5x08) for Supernatural; Early season 7 (at least past Fragile Balance) for SG:1.  
**Characters/Parings**: the Winchesters, SG-1. Appearances from Castiel, Gabriel, Jacob Carter, General Hammond, Janet Fraiser. No pairings.  
**Warnings:** Bad language


End file.
